Bernie
INT. RANDY LERNER’S OFFICE — DAY
Randy invites a guest over for a good chat …
Greener Pastures: 10 Sports Figures Who Found Success After Leaving The Cleve
For many coaches and athletes, Cleveland is the sportsworld equivalent of Dagobah; a swampy crossroads between youthful prodigy and a career apex. Here are 10 of these sports figures.
INT. APPLEBEE’S ® — NIGHT
The Manginis go out for a romantic dinner…
INT. ERIC MANGINI’S OFFICE — DAY
Mangini paces his office/bedroom. Mangini: These morons lived through four years of Butch Davis, then another FOUR FUCKING YEARS of Romeo Crennel, and now they want to fire me after only three games? We’re not even to the bye week and I’M THE WORST NFL HEAD COACH HIRE IN 25 YEARS? ARE YOU SHITTING ME, JOE PO-WHATEVERYOURNAMEIS? I’M A MANGENIUS! Mangini collapses in a [...]
INT. ERIC MANGINI’S OFFICE — NIGHT
Mangini stands next to a chair which has been placed under a ceiling fan. He ties a noose. Mangini: Rex Ryan beats Belichick with my old team while my new team makes the Broncos look like the ’85 Bears. I haven’t seen my wife and kids in four months. The whole league hates me. And [...]
Cleveland Browns Coaching Sweepstakes!
You know the story: Randy “Moneybags” Lerner decided in his infinite wisdom to give Romeo Crennel and Phil Savage each $9-10 million to not have to live in Cleveland anymore. For his next brilliant move, Moneybags will hire a new general manager and head coach. As you might expect, candidates are lining up to coach [...]
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